Hey, Ready To Dad Crew!
A lot of dads are using an idea of success that just doesn’t fit their lives anymore.
That idea was shaped before kids came along. Back then, schedules were different. Mornings weren’t so hectic, evenings felt longer, and there was actually time for yourself.
This week, we’re talking about what happens when we change our definition of success. It’s not about lowering your standards, but about making them fit your life now. That’s an important difference.
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In This Week’s Newsletter
Quote of the Week - 'We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.'
Javaree Talks - All or Something
A Dad Asked Me - The coaching session about “All or Something”
In the News - When it comes to changing habits, smaller steps are better and longer lasting.
Dad Check-in - was the last time you did something just for you?
JAVAREE TALKS
Most of us created our idea of success before we became dads.
Maybe it was one-hour workouts, a set routine, or days where everything went as planned. But once kids came along, that old idea of success started clashing with real life every day.
Recently, I coached a new dad who felt frustrated. He couldn’t get to the gym like he did before his baby was born. His schedule just didn’t allow it, and the opportunities weren’t there. The more he missed his old routine, the more he felt like he was falling short.
I asked his permission to share something I had been working through on my own.
For a long time, I had what I now call an all-or-nothing mindset. If I couldn’t do the full workout with all the weights, time, and energy, I’d tell myself it wasn’t worth doing anything.
Fatherhood challenged that thinking.
My routine is different now. This summer, I walk more places like the store, to camp drop-offs, to camp pick-ups. Once a week, if the weather’s good, I do a 2.5-mile loop that I actually enjoy. It’s not what I used to do, but it’s something. And that something is helping me move forward, both physically and in other ways.
That’s when I started thinking about the idea of all or something.
Maybe it’s just twenty minutes. Maybe it’s a walk while the kids are at camp, or stretching before everyone wakes up. None of these look like my old routine, but they all add up and help me become the dad and person I want to be.
THE TAKEAWAY
All-or-nothing made more sense before kids. All or something fits the life you have now.
TAKEAWAY TO ACTION
Think of one thing you’ve been skipping because you can’t do it like you used to. Ask yourself: what would the all-or-something version of this look like?
Start with the smallest version this week. Maybe it’s a walk, twenty minutes, or five pages. Whatever helps you move toward the person you want to become.
Pay attention to how you talk to yourself when you can’t do the full version. That inner voice matters more than your schedule.
Consistency is the goal. Perfection just gets in the way.
A DAD ASKED ME
A new dad told me he couldn’t get to the gym anymore since his baby arrived. He tried changing his schedule, but nothing worked. The longer it went on, the more he felt like he was losing a part of himself.
I asked if I could share something I’d been working through in my own life. Then I asked him, "What if the goal isn’t getting back to your old routine?" What if the goal is finding out what consistency looks like in the life you have right now?
That’s when we started talking about all or something. It’s not a lesser version of success; it’s just a different way to define it. A walk still counts. Twenty minutes still counts. Stretching with your kid climbing on you still counts.
The real shift isn't logistical. It's how you define progress. And once that changes, the pressure releases a little. You start building something sustainable instead of chasing something that no longer fits your season.
If any of this sounds familiar, reply to this email. That’s exactly what coaching is for.
Q & A CORNER
Reply directly to this email with your question, or use this quick form to submit anonymously. Whether it’s about family routines, connecting with your kids, or managing stress, I’m here to help!
Let’s tackle parenting together, one question at a time!
GET COACHED
Ready To Dad offers coaching services explicitly tailored for dads with young children.
We help you:
Discover your core parenting values.
Learn personalized strategies for growth as a parent.
Build and maintain a deep connection with your child.
Establish a self-care and personal growth routine.
We aim to help you feel more fulfilled and confident in your parenting journey.
Please reply to this email to book a free consultation when you're ready to work with me!
HERE FOR YOU
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